Thursday, December 21, 2006

Sick, Sick, Sick,Sick, Sick!

Today the goddess speaks about herself:

Four days until Christmas and I am sick! This is the fifth day of me being sick(also,the fifth day that I have been on vacation, of course), and today I am sicker than yesterday when I was sicker than the day before. Right now I am hopped up on a combination of painkillers, muscle relaxants and decongestant. ( I'm also in my womanly moon phase --whoopdee frickin' do-- apparently these would have been quintuplets by the ocean of . . . never mind. TMI). Instead of using my altered state to run errands and clean the house, set up the Christmas tree I didn't want and find gifts for two of my bother-in-laws, I am writing about me.
Here I sit in the same ripped up tie-dyed t-shirt I have been wearing; yes, even to bed breaking my own thou shalt not sleep in clothes worn during the day rule. The rule was a self-defense rule since my husband would never change his clothes if he weren't encouraged in that direction-- goddess love him ( and I do). But, here I am breaking my own rule as I am too sick to care. Well, of course, I smell. Being unable to stand myself at this point I will shower and leave the house for more than a 15 minute dog walk. Soon. OK, after my next dose of that orange liquid stuff that tastes like oven cleaner smells. Not that I use oven cleaner; my oven is self-cleaning.
I was supposed to throw a double birthday party for two of the Oolalas tonight. We were going to ring in the solstice with wine, gossip and cigars smoked by the back porch chiminea. Tonight was supposed to be one that I anticipated with enthusiasm, not one where I am hacking on the couch while the girls are partying without me. This stupid illness has left them adrift too. While they can't decide on the restaurant, or what time to gather or if they want to meet at all without their goddess I feel that I have let them down. I really don't need the extra guilt. Guilt does not empower me or make my body heal faster. Also, I ask myself did I really want to throw this party? Did my body succumb to this virus as an excuse to not have the party at my house? Why does it have to be about me? If it weren't about me all of the time would I be sick right now? Can anyone who might be reading this still be more sick of me than I am of myself?
OK, yes. My son leaving for the cabin for the rest of the week, and my beloved staying at his shop all day answer the latter question.
So, I will finally shower and change clothes. I will run those errands and clean the house. I will not do anything about the Christmas tree I didn't want anyway. And, That will be That!
The goddess has spoken.
Peace and good health from, The Goddess of Everything.

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